Little Red Riding Hood!
by SpyofSorrow
Summary: A 2 minute story. Ron's the here, Draco's a dog, Gilderoy is the woodcutter, Snape's a wolf, McGonagall is grandma, Hermoine's annoying and I'm narrator. I just know I'm going to regret writing this. *Gets chased by tons of angry flamers*


Little Red Riding Hood!  
  
Once upon a time, there was a little cottage in the forest. In this cottage lived a handsome boy, who had to bring his grandmother cookies. He decided to put on his red hood-  
  
Ron: Hold on a moment!  
  
What?  
  
Ron: A red hood! Don't tell me this is Little Red Riding Hood!  
  
Eh. Yes.  
  
Ron: No way! I refuse to be that twit!  
  
You will! It's my story, I'm the Narrator, so you are LRRH! Njah! *Sticks her tongue out*  
  
Ron: Grr, fine.  
  
Ron's Mom: Here are the cookies!  
  
Ron: Huh?  
  
RM: That's in the script dear.  
  
Ron: Oh.  
  
Fred/George: Ooh, don't you look cute in that red hood! *Snicker*  
  
Ron: Grr.  
  
So, LRRH headed out to her grandmother's house, singing a happy tune.  
  
Ron: Grmbl.  
  
I said, singing a HAPPY tune!  
  
Ron: Ok, ok. Lalalala.  
  
As he walked on, he suddenly met the beautiful man, the woodcutter, who is happily chopping up the wood.  
  
Gilderoy: *Looks in mirror* Ooh.  
  
I said, chopping the wood!  
  
GL: What? I can't chop wood! I've got people to do that!  
  
Grr. Anyway, Ron saw the woodcutter and greeted.  
  
Ron: Hello. Hey, what's he doing here?  
  
Draco: Yeah! I thought I was going to be the woodcutter!  
  
Sorry guys, the rules state that Gilderoy must be in it! And seeing other places are already taken, sorry Draco.  
  
Draco: Well, what can I play then?  
  
Eeh, you can be the little dog that warns the woodcutter when Ron gets eaten by the wolf.  
  
Ron: EATEN!?  
  
Draco: But there is no dog in LRRH!  
  
Well, now there is! So, you're a dog!  
  
Draco: Bark bark.  
  
Ron: *pale* Eaten!?  
  
Ah, don't worry! You won't be digested!  
  
Ron: Hmm. Hello woodcutter!  
  
GL: Why hello! Do you want my autograph? *smile*  
  
Ron: Eh, no. Bye!  
  
Draco: Bark.  
  
And so, Ron and Draco the doggie return on their journey. But, meanwhile, at grandma's cottage, a mean wolf plans to get to Ron and her cookies, by getting rid of grandma. Grandma lies in her bed, when the wolf barges in.  
  
Snape: Okay, tell me again why I'm the wolf.  
  
You're perfect for it! And besides, if you want your secret stash of Pokemon cards back, you better play your role.  
  
SS: Grr, fine. *barges in* McGonagall: HEY! That was a good looking door!  
  
SS: Minerva!? You're grandma?  
  
MM: You're not the only one she blackmailed. Oh yeah: EEEK!  
  
SS: Don't scream so loud, you're hurting my ears!  
  
MM: Better than you eating me.  
  
SS: What!? I'm not eating her!  
  
*Sigh* Fine, stash her in the cupboard for now!  
  
SS: *puts MM in cupboard* There!  
  
Okay! Now, Ron and Draco continue their journey, when all of the sudden-  
  
Hermoine: Hermoine the Smart comes by and saves the day!  
  
Hermoine! What are you doing?  
  
Hermoine: Saving the readers from this mind crashing nonsense! I'm taking over now!  
  
*All cheer except Narrator*  
  
Noo! You can't do this to me!  
  
Hermoine: Shut up! Anyway, Ron forgets all about his grandma and becomes rich and famous!  
  
Ron: Yeah!  
  
Hermoine: Draco decided to become human and the heir of Voldemort!  
  
Draco: Woohoo!  
  
Hermoine: McGonagall is stuck in the cupboard and stays there forever!  
  
Students: Yeah!  
  
MM: What?!  
  
Hermoine: It's your fault! You gave me a 98% on my latest test! I checked it, and it was a 99%! And Snape becomes rich and famous, but gets assasined by Ron and Draco!  
  
Ron: Not a bad idea.  
  
Draco: Huh?  
  
Snape: Oh great.  
  
Hermoine: And Gilderoy gets married. With me!  
  
Eh, sorry, this is where I step in. Gilderoy doesn't get married with you! He gets married with Jackie, that's how it's supposed to go!  
  
Hermoine: WHAT! No, he wants me!  
  
Okay Gilderoy, choose!  
  
GL: Ehm. Jackie's better looking! Bye! *Runs off*  
  
Hermoine: Waaaaaaah!!  
  
Today's lesson: Never mess with a Narrator! See you! *Runs off with Ron and Draco* 


End file.
